the skinny on skinny jeans.

i have a milestone to proclaim!

i know i’m really skinny with literally no curves so i’ve been avoiding the latest fashion trnd and hiding under my covers. that is, i’m talking about the skinny jeans. i know people say that “oh, skinny jeans are the best for people who don’t have fat thighs and are slim” but you know what? i’m too skinny for skinny jeans. when i wear them, i feel skinnier just because they clamp onto my stick calves and acentuate the fact that i absolutely have no jiggle fat. it’s kind of sad. whenever i flip through the racks at stores now, they’re 90% jeans that start big at the top and go small at the bottom. like an inverted triangle. and then what the heck is this “EXTREME SKINNY” jeans. i mean, i absolutely ENVY girls that look fabulous in those. which is pretty much 87% of the asian girls at my school. i much perfer to toss on my sweatshirt and jeans-that-still-fit-me-from-seventh-grade and hide in the corner because they’re so pretty. i still don’t understand what Shawn sees in me anyways.

anyways, skinny jeans are skinny-enhancing. hence this is why i have not worn them ever. /=  but on the opposite end, my mom tries to stuff me in baggy clothing because apparently that makes me look like i have a bit more fat on me. but making me swim in my clothes and feel lost. right.

but last saturday, i bought my first pair of skinny jeans. an aeropostale size 0* pair. it fits snugly and it doesn’t suck on my lower leg like a leech so it’s not TOO bad. the only reason i bought them is because i would like to buy a pair of rainboots for my upcoming walks around campus for school [it's Seattle afterall. rain season starts ...now.] and i could easily tuck them into my boots. it’s much better than trying to stuff my normal flare pants into there. and plus, they were cheap so…why not. they aren’t that bad. my boyfriend says they look fine. haha, sad that i use him as a judge right? but then again, he would know what looks good on me and he’s pretty brutally honest. “hao, your boobs are flat” “thanks hon, i know.” i actually kind of love them because i can wear any shirt with them and they look fine. now all i need are converses and a huskies sweatshirt and i will officially be a non-individual and conform with the masses.

by the way, this is me being daring. sad right? i should write a college essay on this. what is the more daring thing you have done and why? i bought skinny jeans.

hehe.

*size 0. there was a line from a book that i have where a girl ponders who made a size of clothes that says that body ceases to exist. i will find the quote and post is up but it really made me feel …i don’t know. kind of empty? a size where you end up ceasing to exist. a zero. a size where the body turns into nothing. zero.

..so what about size 00? ]:

remember: rip it, roll it, and punch it.

finding nemo never rocked as much as it did in high definition. i mean, wuh-WOW.

plus, that movie has some very good themes. i mean, c’mon. i’m the one with the overprotective parents that would NEVER let me go downtown after 7 because i’m going to get raped on the corner of 3rd and Pike. yep. you gotta learn from clownfish, mom and dad.

today we went shopping. the mall was absolutely paaaaaaacked. it’s super hot [96?] and HUMID outside and it’s tax-free weekend in Iowa so I guess everyone just flocked to the mall. Jeans and tanks from Aero, Bras and underwear from VS, Shorts from Rue21 and Kohls. and I think I only spent about 120.  WOOHOO. I’m all set from Fall 2009!

Actually not. I’m looking for a good place to get rainboots because I think Ill be walking around campus a lot in the rain. and snow. And then maybe a winter coat. I still love my bomber jacket with the fur around the hood but I think I need a second one too.

Besides the clothes thing. I now understand why when people break up, you should have a clean cut. Slice it. Dice it. However you want to, but make sure it’s clean. Nothing left. Because then, you are able to forget and move on. Let go. Sayonara. Buh-bye. When people hang on, it just hurts. And what’s worst is if it’s just one-sided. Because then, you’re REALLY acting like a loser.

Oh, and I watched Infernal Affairs 2. I was really confused at first because I didn’t realize it was a prequel to the first one so I was like, WTF? And then I was like, ooooooh I see. [Yes, my mind talks JUST LIKE THAT. NO LIE]. Edison Chen IS pretty okay looking. I never really realized it because of the whole sleazy man-whore taking sex scandal was more preoccupied in my mind and that’s what I more focused on. I mean, when a person’s personality is not-so-great, they look less attractive right? BUt that part when he slammed Mary against the wall. I wanted a sex scene right there and then. really. AND Shawn Yue…playing the bad guy. OHMANN. He’s sooooo yummy [: With his hair all spiked up and his hanging earring? Love love love.

What else. Been playing a bit of tennis. I keep hitting it over the wall as normal. I mean, OVER THE FENCE. But I’m getting better and learning how to do that slicing hit and a topspin hit or whatever those are called. I played against the wall when my brother’s not home.

I’m also excited for cat-fishing. Woot woot.

new year’s, clothes, and ghost sex!

alas, it is thursday. which means it is friday tomorrow. which means new year’s is monday! why yes kevin and iz, the best part of new years is rice cakes “ooooohriiiiceeeecakes *mockingly*” 

thanks. lol. 

so apparently it’s the “end of winter season” and all the stores are having sales on clothes and whatnot. i am eagerly awaiting the arrival of my peacoat from ae that i/shawn got for me. lol. yes, i still owe him  half the money so it’s half mine. you can wear it half the time then, hon.  we’ll share xD but in seattle, clearence sale doesn’t matter cuz winter lasts well into february and apparently there MIGHT JUST BE more snow on the way. shitake! it’s already freezingly cold. i actually froze my ass off in the car because my parents stopped by sam’s club and left me in the car cuz i was sleeping and i woke up and was like where the hell am i. yes, kinda disorientated. and the whole diliating my pupils at the optemetrist’s today didn’t help either. it makes EVERYTHING extra blurry. and so i walked out of the clinic all stumbling and stuff (adding to my clumsiness) and squinty. ohmygosh i might have looked extra chinese! =P

i’m listening to clazziquai right now and i think it’s the perfect thing to listen to when the lights are all warming (instead of shockingly flourescent) and the heater is running and you’re all snuggled up in a billion layer of clothes. 

“gentle rain is coming down” ♥

so i read in the newspaper about the lenovo thinkpad W700ds and ITS COMPLETELY AWESOME. it’s like, totally the dream laptop. it has TWO screens and an BLUE-RAY player. oh and 5 USB ports and and like 760 gigs of total memory. and a whole lotta stuff i don’t know what it means but i think it’d be fun to tinker with! xD 

and the last sentence completely cracked me up.

 

” The company says it is aimed at oil and gas explorers, photographers, designers and other PC users who require high performance, but Lamborghini, Hummer and Harley-Davidson owners might also appreciate it. ” –NY Times, 1/22/09

it’s like. almost 4K. ohmygosh!

—————————————–

anyways. i have this horrible cancker sore thats RIGHT ON MY LIP. it’s all pulsing and stuff too. like a volcano ready to explodddeeee. if i bit it really hard it would probablyooze RED FLAMING BLOOD LAVA (: gross, i know. it’s pretty devestating because i can’t find my favorite chapstick anywhere and my lips are cracking and gross. grr.

okay. shower then grey’s anatomy. it’s going to be juicccccaaaay. bailey and derek face-off! mer der kissface! did you know they’re quote “grooming” unquote Arizona to be a love interest for Callie? i mean, arizona does not seem like a closet lez/bi. and mark and lexie, more sex! izzie and denny, sex no more! wow, grey’s is downhill but cross your fingers for more “deep” drama.

i do like the on-death-row guy though. he really plays the part well. and if he will die anyway, just let him give his damn organs to the little boy! 

okay. shower!

nothing is better.

i went shopppppppppppppping.

lalallalallalalala yay yippeee! now i’m basically, good until next summer when i come back to iowa. i only went to three stores too. aeropostale. rue21. and kohls. oh yes! though i spent too much money though. i hyperventilated when the cashier was ringing up the stuff and the numbers were adding up. ><

and i’ve drove a bit too. so that makes me happy. i have wen on many curbs, turned too fast, an almost hit a parked car. bwahahaha oh yes! and i’ve been driving for less than 2 hours total too. ohmann, i wonder how i’m going t do when i actually start driving. stay off the road. consider yourself warned seattleites.

and i went to the library and got a lot of haruki murakami books. that is the shtuff right there! i mean, seriously. go read him. the way he uses words is just absolutely amazing.

i also had lots of gelato today. lime jalepeno, wildberry jalepeno, and raspberry chocolate. you can’t get the jalepeno flavors anywhere in seattle. i’m so serious. i love it sooo much but i can only get it here. sad!

and what else,

i’m up at 2:22am watching music vids on VH1.

 

oh, this is the life.

only oneand half more weeks til school starts! oh,ew.

but yay, meeting people!

undergarments and sats.

i swear the SAT is overrated. i took it today and it was just like any other test i took. wasl. psats. whatever. i do find calmness in sitting there and filling in bubbles and solving problems though. people might think i’m crazy. i feel like i lost 4 hours of my life but i’d much rather be spending that four hours testing and exercising my brain than killing cells with tv or something like that. yes, i know. weird. and like…you hear stories about how students cheat for the SATs and are freaking out and doing like study groups and stuff. i mean that stuff sells. just look at the enormous section of guidebooks in the bookstore to help you with the sats. but i took them and thought they were…a test. i felt minimal stress. i just remembered that if i didn’t know the answer at all, it wasn’t going to come to me if i stared at it long enough. i had to keep in mind that they dock me more points if a get it wrong than if i don’t answer it. what else. reading and writing was easy. the only thing that i strained about was math. typically. or..untypical since i’m asian. ahhaa oh the love of stereotyping. but yea. i can’t say i hate the SATs. i only hate the aspect of getting my ass into some random place at 7:45am and getting yelled at by some proctor lady cuz i said hi to a friend and then having to wait an hour to actually take the test and not being able to have breakfast beforehand. the end.

 

i bought three tanks today. it was in those packets of three though so technically i made on purchase. they’re blue, lime green, and blank. boyfriend tanks. or wifebeaters as some people call them. but why they call them that i do not know. but yea. i’ve been meaning to get some so im quite happy. and i also got new underwear! that may not be a big deal. and quite something personal too. but i like them. i’ve never bought underwear in those default packages of like 6 (which is the kind i bought today) cuz i usually buy them singualrly. but i decided to go cheapo and buy a package. first-timer. they’re cute though. if you don’t know my theory on confidence here it is. always wear good undergarments. not just panties (oh that words makes me laugh. it’s just so…feminine X_X) but  bras too. if sexy works for you, then do sexy. if comfort is what you’re about, do comfort. just wear what makes you feel happy. i think that that’s how you build confidence. if you feel good about what you’re wearing, then you’ll feel good all around. i always feel drabby if i’m wearing an something uncomfortable and it just makes me feel high self-conscious which…makes me feel horrible. so yea. 

oh i wanted to say that i saw a few people i haven’t seen in a while today. and guess what. im indifferent. seriously. i was like “hi..okay leave me alone.” i wonder if i really have left those who don’t matter behind. and did i wrongly judge those who don’t matter to me? seriously deep discussions in my mind going on right now. x__x

 

memorial day burgers and hairlessness!

ahh yes, three day weekend gone and past and im feel like i had quite a great weekend. even my dad was all like “hm hao you didn’t do anything this weekend. having a lot of fun are we? (hidden meaning in those words: sit your ass down and stop going out and do your hwk. no more fun!)” 

today i must say that im quite happy because yesterday, i FINALLY bought replacement heads for my razor and TODAY, i shaved my legs. ahhhh  yes heaven! i swear, the best feeling in the world is having smooth legs. oh and applying a little lotion to them too so they don’t get all dry and ashy cuz that does NOT look good. anyways, yes. i shaved my legs. it’s been like a few weeks and i havent done it an i know i know. gross. it’s just that seattle doesnt get that sunny often so i just hide my legs under my jeans and in badminton when i wear shorts, it doesn’t matter anyway cuz i play with guys and they have hairier legs than i do so whatev..

but you know what the downside of shaving your legs is? and new blades? sometimes you nick just a small part of your leg and it starts bleeding. AND IT DOEST STOP. i swear! the cut is like freaking one millimeter and it won’t. stop. bleeding =O it’s just like. woohoo! *blood erupts like lava outta a mountain* AND! sometimes you’re in the shower, and you really don’t notice if you miss a spot on your legs. and then when you step out and you examine your newly shaven sleek sex goddess legs, you’re like AHH I MISSED A SPOT. and it’s like a hair island. and it’s sooo annoying. i mean, i don’t wanna get BACK into the shower just to freaking shave the spot. although i do end up doing just that because i..don’t want a hair island. heh. but yea. i rememeber one time, i just sat there and took tweezers and plucked the hair. and lemme tell you, i’m so not doing that again because my skinw as so raw and in pain when i was done. it’s like a wax. only one hair at a time =(

 

today i was suppose to be all like at home and moping around doing my chores and stuff. i watched I am Legend which is SUCH a freaky movie. omg. and then my brother came home surprisingly and he took me shopppppppppping. wait not lemme correct that. *”shoppppppppping”. i put the quotes cuz it’s more like i looked around and tried on stuff and didn’t buy anything. it’s cuz im such a cheapass. and plus, it was hella hectic today cuz everyone’s all like “MEMORIAL DAY SALE! OMG!” and all the clothes and stuff are on the floor and bleh. nordstrom rack has that cute brand “Psst” where it’s just like BOLD colored tanks and tshirts. just plain tank/tshirts. nothing on it. no logos no pictures. it’s just. a colored shirt. and the fabric is soooo soft and stuff against your body and it’s amazing! but..it’s like 8 dollars a shirt. and i really cannot buy a  8 dollar tank top when i can buy a three pack at costco for 10. mwahaha see how cheap i am?

marshalls, best buy, sports authority, old navy, ross, kohls, nordstrom rack, barnes and noble. yay!

& theeeeeeeen. i hit the jackpot cuz we went to red robin’s. i will confess. i have never eaten at red robin’s before. i’ve had their strawberry lemonade though once at long time ago. so yea. we go there and we eat and i had one the biggest burgers i’ve had in my life (excluding the fatty one i had in vietnam cuz it was probably full of e. coli or something. xD jk) it was hella good though, just huge. so by the time i finished, i had untied my pants and released the first button at the top of the zipper. and i was like “ugggh” all the way to the car. i think i ate too fast cuz i seriously wanted to throw up. i just crawled into a ball in the car and sang leona lewis all the way back home where i was like…comatose. but then i burnt off those calories by mopping my kitchen floor and washing the dishes (;

 

long day. long blog. i must start to do the powerpoint i promised my accounting group that i would give to them friday..last week >< and i must start my essay for history and wow im way behind! ohwell. it’s rare that i ever get to have any fun during my weekends so we all must make sacrifices =P

ciao!

10 Reasons Why I Hate Being Skinny

I know that 25% of Americans are obese or whatever. But I am in that .82749% of Americans that are skinny. NATURALLY. Now everyone’s all like, “ohmygoshyouaresoskinnyimsojealous!” but, uh i’m not really happy with that. On the scale at my house, I am 98 lbs (*gasps!!*) and on the scale at my doctor’s office I am 101 lb (*gaspss again!*). I know. Be jealous. Not.

Here we go!

1) Hearing “ohmygoshyouaresoskinnyimsojealous!” over and over again. I’m seriously sick of it. Wanna be skinny? Ever heard of getting off your couch potato but and going outside for a run? Okay, maybe you exercise. Well. Commit to it.

2) Hearing my name connected with the words “anorexic” and “diet” and “not eating”.Shut up people! I eat as much as you do. Maybe even more (I’m talking to all you dieters that eat one carrot stick a day or something. It won’t work)! Don’t JUDGE me because you don’t watch me on a surveillance camera 24/7 and monitor what foods go into my mouth.

Same goes with “you should eat more.”

3) Being reluctant to exercise because you might lose the weight you gained the week before.I just recently found out that I love jogging. The steady thump-thump of your feet as you move across the pavement, grass, or whatever. It’s like flying if you close your eyes (though not recommended because light poles and street signs DO exist). But although it makes my legs stronger, it makes my waist drop a size. Ahhh horrible.

4) Picking up trashy celeb magazines and all you see is “Lose 20 pounds!” & “______. Too skinny? Too fat?” Seriously. I like to indulge upon the lives of the rich and famous just like the other person, but spare me the weight examinations. It makes me feel bad, and it makes the slightly overweight but still damn gorgeous girl next to me self-conscious too.

5) Finding bottoms that fit nicely.People wouldn’t think that this would be a problem but it is. Pants/Jeans that are snug at the waist, flattering on the body, and long past my feet are SO DAMN HARD TO FIND. And plus, i’m skinny but I’m 5′5″ so size 0s are usually too short. >=O

6) How you look like a stick in everything that shows your shoulders and above or knees and below. No explanation needed. It’s a pain.

7) Being light.Push me and I fall. Punch me and I bruise. Blow at me and I fly <– Jk.

8 ) Maybe this is just for me but..Hard to float on water. Is it just because I have minimal body fat?

9) Being cold easily. It’s 65 degrees and I’m still in a sweater and shivering. How the girl across the street comfortable in a small tank top and shorts, I do not know.

10) Lack of boobage. Laugh all you want. But then again, if I did have a nice rack, it’d look odd on my skinny body wouldn’t it. Like bowling balls balanced on a board =P

—————————

This may seem like a rant. A list of complaints. In many ways it is. But really, I am very happy with my body and I really think a lot of girls should be too. Everyone is gorgeous in their own way; fat or not fat, boobs or no boobs, tall or short. If there’s is some aspect that you don’t like about you body, aim to change it. If you really put your mind into it, everything will work out fine. But in the end, maybe your body is just like that. So really.

LOVE IT.

 

I’m in a PMSing mood gosh dang it ):

 

♥